Saroj Yadavadventures of everyday life

There has been too much Gandhi in my personal life since Christmas:

I read his autobiography 2 months ago during my Argentina trip,

I watched “Gandhi” movie just 2 weeks ago and

after watching movie I had this urge to buy Gandhi’s poster which says “My life is my message”

Gandhi & his character are so fresh in my mind that when I read  all kind of news about auction of his belongings, I  wonder about the irony of this whole situation. Of all the people, this is about this half-naked man whose whole life was about simplicity, truth& fight for things beyond material possessions.

Understandably all Indians,including myself, are feeling very passionate about his items not being in India. However sometimes I wonder how Gandhi would have felt if he had seen today’s India & situations like these. My guess is if he knew  his sandals were worth so many millions he would have sold it himself and provide shelter or spinning wheels to people with this money. If he had seen today’s India he would have felt little sad that all his life & struggle was for a place like India is today.

Anyways, I wish Indians feel same passionate about truth & justice as they are feeling about his items. I wish Indians have conviction like Gandhi to believe in what’s right & what’s not and  have strength like “Bapu” to fight for them. That will be priceless!!

It is a weird day today. This is how it goes.

Due to my deadline for today, I have been working really hard since last couple of days. This morning I get up, start working and then head for the office. Just before I am leaving I see the latest Economist issue with “Bombay Attacks” on the cover page. I take it with me.

In the train I read 2-3 pages about how the attacks in Bombay this time represent a different kind of attacks. It’s the raw terror. It says no one is safe. The news of the attackers shooting people in the Taj restaurant somehow reminds me of the day in Bangalore when my mom & sister visited me. I remember that day I took them to a restaurant which was on 13th floor – really stylish & expensive. Just when I am lost in my thought, my station comes and I get off.

After my deadline I feel exhausted. For some reason I am feeling so tired & with out energy that I can’t focus. I almost sleep in my chair for 2 minutes. I decide to go back to my apt and take a nap. I feel a vacuum inside and it is making me really drained.

I come back to my apt and crash in my bed.
I see that there are attacks in my village – the village I grew up in. I am on the roof and I can see women getting attacked all around me. Some women are hung upside down and are being tortured. I can see them from my roof. I see my sister is next to me. She is crying because one of her friends is in the women being tortured. She says she is scared herself. I look at her and tell her nothing bad will happen to her. I ask her to close her eyes and think of a sunny day when sun was warm and nice.

I open my eyes and realize I am in my apt in San Francisco. It’s a weird nightmare. I switch on my TV. I see BBC news – there is news of Iraq, Afganistan(with people riding motor bikes with guns in their hands), Pakistan, India, Kenya.

Living in a world where nightmares are all around us is pretty scary.

In response to Bombay attacks, I thought starting off a blogger event
will make me at peace with my country being attacked & bombed every few months. But it does not seem to be helping. I am still in a vacuum.